Just Amazing

Wow! Two updates within a few hours? What is the world coming to? I have never updated my blog so soon, but this could not wait for another day. Okay, so just a few minutes ago, while browsing through usatoday.com, I came acrossed something rather "interesting." You see, the reason I put interesting in quotes isn't obvious now, but it will be in a few short moments. Click here to see what I'm talking about.

Okay, so if you still haven't figured out what I am talking about, take a very close look at that "graph" (and I use the term graph loosely). Let me point out the headline: "65% of fireworks injuries occur around July 4th." Oh boy, wow! I mean, who would have thought that 65% of fireworks injuries occur around the fucking fourth of July. I mean, the fourth of July isn't known for its firework displays or anything, so that is just amazing. I never knew that it was common practice to light fireworks during the fourth of July, so it is really surprising that injuries, caused by fireworks no less, happen so frequently during that time. Jeez, I was wondering what all those loud noises and bright flashes in the sky were about, I just thought I was having flashbacks to my Vietnam days (I am 20, by the way). To quote Forest Gump, "We was always taking long walks, and we was always looking for a guy named 'Charlie.'"

If you haven't picked up my sarcasm yet, you should get your sarcasm sensor checked because I am laying it on pretty thick. I mean, really, that is the best USA Today could do for that days snapshot? Just for your reference, that snapshot appeared on the July 29th edition of USA Today. You know what, I need to get my people on this one. I don't care how many letters I have to write, USA Today does not deserve the title of "The Nation's Newspaper." I am kidding, by the way, I usually enjoy USA Today, but that little snapshot got me going. It must have seemed like a good idea at the time, but all it did was state the obvious. It is okay to state the obvious sometimes, but to actually waste space on the front page of a newspaper...well, that is inexcusable. I mean, they couldn't have posted a picture of a missing kid instead? Or possibly a used car ad? Anything would have been better than that piece of work....

Oh, and this entry would not be complete without another quote from Forest Gump: "...and that's all I gotta say about that." Thank you and good night.